Lauv - First Heartbreak Lyrics
I wanna tell you
I'm right here
But I'm still so angry even after all these years
I know your family was falling apart
So I don't blame you but I still have a heart
All of my friends and my therapist say
That it's nothing and I've gone insane
Everyone says I'm a narcissist
Truth is I just haven't dealt with the blame
You chose the drugs, and now everyone else is your friend
And I'm left in the flame
There's nothing like first heartbreak
Know I should move on
God knows I've tried
But I hit this strange wall without you by my side
We were forever at one point in time
The night you left me
You left me half alive
I started running, got faster and faster
But I just couldn't get away
All of my problems got bigger and bigger
Until I couldn't feel the pain
Because you chose the drugs, and now everyone else is your friend
And I'm going insane
There's nothing like first heartbreak
Ooooh Ooooh Ooooh Ooooh Ooooh Ooooh Ooooh Ooooh
Ooooh Ooooh Ooooh Ooooh Ooooh Ooooh Ooooh Ooooh
Ooooh Ooooh Ooooh Ooooh Ooooh Ooooh Ooooh Ooooh
Ooooh Ooooh Ooooh
I had to lose you to find myself
You can't know heaven until you know hell
I'll always love you even if you're gone
I'm letting go but always holding on
Lauv's "First Heartbreak" explores the lingering pain of a past relationship, especially the challenges of moving on after a significant breakup.
### Themes
1. **Heartbreak and Anger**: The lyrics reveal the deep hurt and unresolved anger stemming from a breakup. The narrator struggles with feelings of abandonment and betrayal, particularly in light of their former partner's choices (e.g., turning to drugs and leaving the narrator behind).
2. **Self-Reflection and Blame**: The narrator grapples with self-blame and the perception of being labeled a narcissist. This reflects the internal conflict of dealing with the fallout of the relationship and the difficulty in coming to terms with their emotions.
3. **Loss and Healing**: The song touches on the theme of loss as a catalyst for self-discovery. The narrator acknowledges that despite the pain, the experience was necessary for personal growth.
### Emotions
- **Anger and Sadness**: The song is filled with raw emotion, showcasing the narrator's anger and sadness over the breakup and their former partner's actions.
- **Confusion and Insanity**: The repeated mentions of going insane suggest the overwhelming nature of the emotional turmoil experienced.
- **Resignation and Acceptance**: By the end, there's a sense of resignation, as the narrator comes to terms with the fact that they had to lose their partner to find themselves.
### Key Terms and Notable Lines
- **"You chose the drugs, and now everyone else is your friend"**: This line highlights the narrator's sense of betrayal and abandonment, emphasizing the destructive choices of their former partner.
- **"There's nothing like first heartbreak"**: This recurring line underlines the uniqueness and intensity of the initial heartbreak, suggesting it as a formative experience.
- **"I had to lose you to find myself"**: A pivotal line that signifies the personal growth and self-discovery resulting from the breakup.
### Overall Message
The song delves into the complexities of dealing with a first major heartbreak. It portrays the enduring impact of a past relationship, where unresolved feelings and the journey towards healing are central themes. Despite the pain and anger, there is a recognition that such experiences are integral to personal development and self-discovery.
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